Comments on Weebles Wobblog: Moments in Open Adoption Parenting, part 73

I'm working on trying to find something intelligen...

2010-01-22T15:50:10.438-07:00

I'm working on trying to find something intelligent to say. I came here through the Creme09 but this post really hits home to my Mom through Adoption center. The main thing that struck me was your comment about not personalizing her question. I'm finding for myself as well, that the first and most important job is to recognize that what it isn't about me being her mommy, it's

Hi Lori, Thanks so much for your comment on my bl...

2010-01-19T14:54:23.456-07:00

Hi Lori,

Thanks so much for your comment on my blog! It led me here, and has in turn led me to other amazing blogs that are invaluable as we consider adoption.

This post in particular is so helpful because I think this is one of the things I fear the most with adoption. I know it's inevitable, but you handled it with such grace, and I hope that if/when it happens to me,

Wow. You're awesome. :) It was a tough one to not ...

2010-01-13T13:00:13.914-07:00

Wow. You're awesome. :) It was a tough one to not let it turn into something about you, but you did a fabulous job at helping Tessa through it. I hope to be able to take those 6 steps one day with my kiddies.

Here from CdC. Great reading. You are a very str...

2010-01-11T06:29:15.697-07:00

Here from CdC.
Great reading.
You are a very strong and unselfish woman and your little girl is very lucky to have you as her mother.
Best of luck to you all,

Mina

That was beautiful! I will revisit your process be...

2010-01-08T22:56:33.346-07:00

That was beautiful! I will revisit your process before speaking! That was great. I like that you helped give her your blessing to think on how things could be, but what was. That will be very helpful with my children! Thanks!

That was simply beautiful. I added you to my blogr...

2010-01-07T10:59:47.035-07:00

That was simply beautiful. I added you to my blogroll and I'll post this blog to the Creating a Family community. Thank you for sharing and for your wisdom.

Dawn Davenport
Creating a Family-nonprofit providing education and resources on IF and Adoption

Absolutely stunning. Wonderful mother. Wonderful...

2010-01-07T08:10:14.048-07:00

Absolutely stunning.

Wonderful mother.

Wonderful writer.

Popped over from the crème de la crème list. Excel...

2010-01-02T12:57:13.027-07:00

Popped over from the crème de la crème list. Excellent post, a peek into what open adoption can mean.

And like Mel said, those points can apply in any relationship.

Breathtaking... Thank you for sharing this mome...

2010-01-01T19:10:43.324-07:00

Breathtaking...

Thank you for sharing this moment in time with us. As I allow my brain and heart to think a little more often on adoption as a possibility for us, these are the kinds of moments that I wonder about the most. I think you handled it with grace and patience and love.

this might actually be my second comment to this p...

2010-01-01T17:20:27.458-07:00

this might actually be my second comment to this post as I read it when you posted it, and found it to be such a breathtaking look into what this moment truly looked like. Thank you for being so open. It is beautiful.

Fantastic and selfless. She is blessed to have you...

2010-01-01T12:47:37.025-07:00

Fantastic and selfless. She is blessed to have you as her Mum.

Thank you for this honest and heart-string-tugging...

2010-01-01T11:21:52.910-07:00

Thank you for this honest and heart-string-tugging post about adoption. As my husband and I explore all of our child options, it's always good to hear what happens when that little baby can talk, and ask questions. You handled this so beautifully.

I think it is a conversation like this this makes ...

2009-11-09T11:30:06.859-07:00

I think it is a conversation like this this makes us afraid to explore adoption more. Though, hey, this did not seem as scary as what usually runs through my head.

such a great post. I think there is much wisdom i...

2009-11-09T02:46:47.965-07:00

such a great post. I think there is much wisdom in this that I needed to hear today. Thank you.

One day I hope to be as perceptive and 'allowing' ...

2009-11-08T21:30:16.908-07:00

One day I hope to be as perceptive and 'allowing' mom as you (meaning, allowing your children to figure things out for themselves, and have their own paths, i/o just telling them "well, you have this and this and this that you should be grateful for!", and understanding that their journey to become well-rounded adults starts when they are this young)... If I can do the following

A great post. Showing such patience and understan...

2009-11-07T08:38:04.884-07:00

A great post. Showing such patience and understanding to your daughter--brought a lump to my throat.

Thank you for sharing this post. My husband and I ...

2009-11-06T23:46:13.283-07:00

Thank you for sharing this post. My husband and I just finished a 7-week adoption seminar and open adoption has been on my mind a lot.

Thank you for sharing how this can be. And how beautifully it can be handled.

Thank you.

Great answers. Don't know what could have been wi...

2009-11-06T20:10:31.514-07:00

Great answers. Don't know what could have been wiser.

Bea

47th comment here so you know what I am going to s...

2009-11-06T13:50:02.160-07:00

47th comment here so you know what I am going to say and what everyone else recognizes too: Wow! I hope I have your grace and wisdom when I get similar questions.

You are amazing. I can't imagine how difficult it...

2009-11-06T10:43:34.365-07:00

You are amazing. I can't imagine how difficult it would be to remember to keep the conversation about her and not make it about you. I know my own heart and I don't know if I would have been able to keep the focus off myself.

Thank you so much for sharing this story. Even from a non-open adoption standpoint, it reminds me to step back from a difficult situation and take the

Lori, that was a perfect discussion. I mostly lur...

2009-11-06T10:11:24.062-07:00

Lori, that was a perfect discussion. I mostly lurk but I learn so much from you and had to post to say thank you for keeping the list of priorities in the right order. K is too young to ask these questions himself, though I know it's coming with the way his speech has improved, but P (who is biological) asks them more than I'd expected. It helps to see how other people have helped

Wow. What an amazing conversation. I have to admit...

2009-11-06T09:32:12.546-07:00

Wow. What an amazing conversation. I have to admit that I don't know if I could manage in the moment to not take this personally. You handled this so well. Just amazing.

Oh my gosh! Lori, this is an amazing post! I am si...

2009-11-06T09:30:59.330-07:00

Oh my gosh! Lori, this is an amazing post! I am simply in awe of you for being so calm and understanding. Tessa is going to look back on that moment one day and remember how you listened to her and let her express how she was feeling. It is a wonderful thing that she has Crystal and Joe in her life and that you and Roger are such supportive parents.

I'm sure I will be coming to

Just a lurker who pops in now and then, here from ...

2009-11-06T08:35:50.533-07:00

Just a lurker who pops in now and then, here from the round-up. I have to say, though, that regardless of what you could have said, it seems from the conversation that what you said was just right for the time. Perfect and comforting, and allowing her to work through her fears and worries.

Wow, I think I would have flipped out, I hate to s...

2009-11-06T04:44:59.957-07:00

Wow, I think I would have flipped out, I hate to say it. I hope you are writing a book on how to deal with situations like these. Truly inspirational.